When Ernest Hemingway coined the phrase “grace under pressure” in 1926, he had no way of knowing that nearly 100 years later, country star Kelsea Ballerini performing at the 2024 Glamour Women of the Year awards would come to embody the Platonic ideal of the concept.
When Ballerini agreed to sing a few songs from her reflective fifth studio album, Patterns, at the event, she knew there would be some important eyes on her. One look around the 100-seat venue and that was obvious—Pamela Anderson and Taraji P. Henson were there, as were Olympians Allyson Felix and Suni Lee to name a few—but what she didn’t know was that moments before she took the stage, a ripple permeated the room. Audible gasps were heard. And within seconds Beyoncé—yes, Beyoncé—serenely took her seat at a small round table inches from the stage to wait for Ballerini to start singing. Which she did, but not before kicking off her heels in what felt like a game-time decision.
“My East Tennessee came out didn’t it?” the 31-year-old told me after the event when asked about the shoe toss. “Honestly, I just wanted to be comfortable to be able to move around freely and sing along with the women in the room. The stilettos were fabulous, but I just felt like I wanted a little more freedom in the moment.”
Make no mistake, it was Ballerini’s moment—the stage was hers and hers alone, and the audience cheered loudly when she was announced—but it’s hard to argue with the fact that spotting a surprise audience member in the form of one of the most important performers and cultural icons of our generation can be a knock-you-off-your-center force for any artist.
“Beyoncé walking in 15 seconds before I went out was not on my bingo card,” Ballerini said. “Singing ‘Lean on Me’ and having her and the room sing along was such a beautiful moment, and I’m so glad I got to tell her how much I love and appreciate her country record.” (Another game-time decision that was both heartfelt and authentic—see it here.)
Ahead of the event, I caught up with Ballerini over Zoom to talk about Patterns, which officially was released on October 25 and debuted days later at a sold-out Madison Square Garden concert (no big deal), her upcoming gig as a coach on The Voice in 2025, tabloid culture, country as a genre, and more.
Glamour: The first thing I want to talk about are the lyrics that permeate Patterns. They’re personal, but also so diaristic that it would be hard to assume they’re about anything other than really specific moments in your own life. Like the track “Two Things” opens with “I love New York / but I can’t stay at The Carlyle anymore / my head and bed were messy from the night before.” That’s not abstract!
Kelsea Ballerini: The whole record is hyper-personal, although every record I’ve done has been a version of a snapshot of years of my life. But [2023 EP] Rolling Up the Welcome Mat was created so differently than a proper studio album because it was so personal. Whereas, when I make country records, I make a record that I love, but I make it for anyone that finds it. I didn’t do that with Welcome Mat, so I didn’t round the edges. I mean, I put my dog’s name in it, I put the street I lived on, it was littered with details that were very clearly about me. I was so interested in how people really related to that even more so than the records I’d put out before.
And so, when I was making Patterns, I was back in the mindset of making a studio record, but wanted to keep that level of sincerity and that level of detail and clarity. It was really important to me because that was the biggest lesson I took away from Welcome Mat—honoring that side of songwriting and not rounding the edges and not omitting things that make it so detailed to my story.
If somebody asked you right now what Patterns is about—not the track, but the album—what would you say?
I’d say Patterns is about self-assessment, womanhood, the nuance of love, and the want for growth.
I was struck by the song “Sorry Mom” because I feel like every young woman should be required to write a version of that song as a cathartic exercise. It felt so connective, like everybody can relate. Essentially, you’re apologizing to your mom for being a young woman in the world and the ways that’s often taken out on a parent. Were you a difficult young adult?
I’m an only child and a Virgo and a people pleaser, so I think I was a relatively easy kid and teenager. But, like any mom, there was a desire for mine to want to protect and shield me from bad decisions or anything that could lead you down a difficult path. Sometimes, as the kid, you have to make your own decisions, even though it’s probably not the decision your mom or your dad wants you to make. I honestly feel like this is a coming-of-age song. I’m finally at the place I can talk to my mom like a woman and not just like her daughter, and it’s been a beautiful breakthrough in our relationship.
Does she love that I have tattoos? No, she doesn’t. Every detail on the song is all the things that I’ve now been like, “Mom, I did this, this, and this.” I know it’s not your favorite thing, but look at me. I’m a woman that you love, that you’re proud of, and I took my own route.
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What did she think about the song?
She loves it. Her first reaction was, “Kelsea, do you think that I’m not proud of you?” I was like, “No, mom. I’ve never thought that.” One of my favorite lyrics is, “Maybe I ran all the red lights / Maybe we got into a few fights.” It’s so simple, but it symbolizes so much.
When you were working on the album, where did you look for inspiration?
I didn’t have to look far. I was turning 30, coming out of the craziest year of my life. There was a lot to write about.
I was looking at the credits of the album—it was incredible seeing all the female collaborators.
I made the whole record with four other women.
Can you tell me a little bit about that? Was that your idea? How did you find them? Did you know who you wanted?
It was my idea, but it wasn’t planned. I was very slow to start making this record because last year was the busiest year of my life. I really wanted the space to live a life to write about, so I wasn’t just putting fluff with a good beat out into the world. So when I was ready to start the process, I wanted to do it with people that I felt safe to throw paint at the wall and figure out what this next chapter of music was going to sound like. I called four of my friends who are just massively talented and successful women, and we went away for three days and ended up writing three of the songs on the record.
Then I decided to just shut and lock the door. I was like, I want to do this whole thing with you guys. Think-tank style, where we can all take the time to exist together in this chapter of life and collaborate.
That sounds like a dream for a female artist.
It was awesome. It was so safe. That’s why I used “womanhood” as one of the words to describe Patterns. Having women who are all different ages, some are mothers, some are in relationships, some are single—we all had all these different perspectives to add in. What that does for conversation leads to songs.
Let’s talk about The Voice. You’ll be joining the show as a coach for season 27—that’s huge.
So, I’ve done a couple things with the show before this, but the biggest chunk was when Kelly Clarkson wasn’t feeling well, called me, had me get on a plane the next day to fill in. It was chaotic, and I was so nervous. But I left that day and—I actually have the screenshot—I texted my friends and said, “I want this job.” When Blake [Shelton] left, the producers came to Nashville. They were interviewing several country artists, and I knew I was one of them. We had this lovely dinner, and at the end—I’m really not like this—I leaned across the table and said, “Hey, I’m sure you’re meeting with people that are legends that have a longer track record than me and that are amazing. I just want to tell you that I really want this. I really want this job.”
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Sometimes you gotta just go for it.
And I did. I said, I’m going to shoot my shot. I was like, I know I can do it, and I really want it. So it feels very full circle in that way. Being with John Legend, Michael Bublé, and Adam Levine, holding it down for the girls and country and all that, it’s been a learning experience. I definitely feel like I’m being sharpened as an artist and as a collaborator. I’m really enjoying it.
Switching gears. I'm always curious about the interior lives of famous people and how they unwind and take time for themselves. You have a lot going on at all times. You have teams. Are you ever alone? Like, truly just by yourself?
I recently had the realization that I hadn’t been alone in a long time, maybe like two years. I used to love being alone when I was a kid. I had myself as an only child, and it really freaked me out because I went from loving it to not knowing how to do it, and it’s scaring me. I try now to create balance in general in my life more than I ever have. When I spend time with people, it’s really intentional. Sometimes I used to use friendships as escapism, so I didn’t have to sit with myself or deal with my feelings. Now I feel pretty comfortable sitting with my feelings and my dialogue and my monologue.
How do you decompress when you need it, whether it’s at the end of a long day or a long tour?
One thing that’s really helped me is having something on the calendar to look forward to, even if it’s a full year away. Having a little light at the end of a tunnel, especially when it’s a really chaotic season. That’s been a tool for me that I know has really helped. Whether it’s a weekend trip with my friends, my boyfriend, whatever, just something to look forward to. And then, finding things that can be consistent no matter where I am. So cooking—I can do that in LA at the house I’m renting just like I can in my own kitchen in Nashville. That’s been a good thing for me at the end of long days, to just get home and whip up some pasta or whatever. And then honestly, the biggest thing for me, especially right now, is time with my dogs. Everything else just kind of feels like it goes away for a little bit.
Recently there’s been a spate of artists getting very real about fame and how scary it can be when you’re public-facing and have rabid fandoms. I would guess that, because of social media, fans feel like they’re entitled to every ounce of you. Do you ever feel that?
I’ve always been a bit of an oversharer by nature, and I used to do that in every area of my life. I’ve recently learned a bit more about what to keep for myself. It’s not because I want to omit parts of my reality because I feel exploited. It’s because I like the idea that sometimes there’s parts of my real life that are just mine. And I’m lucky. I feel like in my experience, everyone is really respectful. There’s not a lot of very intense behavior, but it’s a personal choice to just kind of pull the reins back a little bit.
On the same side of that coin: How do you handle tabloid gossip, whether it’s about your divorce or your boyfriend [Outer Banks star Chase Stokes], who’s also a public figure. When you see stuff written about you, do you care? Does it bother you, or are you just like, “LOL moving on”?
I mean, there’s truly only been piqued interest in my personal life or me as a human during the last few years. I was used to people, especially in the country space, knowing some of my songs or being familiar with me, but there wasn’t an interest in what I’m doing and who I was dating, so that’s definitely been a bit of a shift. But I don’t know, I guess when it first started happening, I was doing all of the creeping on myself to see what was going on, and I saw enough falseness that I realized that it’s probably not healthy for me. So if I see stuff, I giggle it off or I’ll send it to a friend or whatever. But other than that I try to let ’em ride.
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Lastly, I want to talk about country music. When I was young, the big party line was, “I like every type of music except country.” It felt so silly, but now it seems it has really exploded on a global scale; people have really taken to the genre, even if they don’t necessarily relate to the lyrics or the stereotypes in some of the music. What about it do you think has endeared more people to it?
Well, I feel like right now—maybe not strictly from a radio standpoint—but if you’re listening to a country playlist, it’s almost a mirror of pop radio or a pop playlist where you have Drake and then you have Ed Sheeran, then you have Benson Boone. There are so many genres within that. Now with country, you pull up a playlist and you have Shaboozey. And then, there are new people that I love like the Ella Langley and Riley Green duet I can’t get enough of. It’s so traditionally country-sounding but so new. You have freaking Post Malone! It’s exciting.
I love seeing how that many dynamics can make country music. I grew up at a time where on the radio it was George Strait, and it was Shania Twain. Those are two very different kinds of country music, but there was space for both of them, and there was success for both of them. It’s nice to see that happening right now in so many different ways with so many different artists.
I feel like you’re part of a generation of country artists that openly embraces newness to the genre—whether that be racial diversity or LGBTQ representation.
I’m definitely proud to be a part of the wave of country music that at least talks about it. I don’t think anything changes in country music unless you start having conversations; that’s how you really start to figure out how to move things forward. I definitely feel like you’re right—over the last five years, there have been a lot of conversations, and honestly, it started with women in country music. That was the first thing to tackle. And then, obviously, there were much bigger topics and issues that we needed to get into. It’s a continuous journey that will happen forever, not just in country music, but in general. I know what I’m in control of and how I can do my part and my little piece of country music, and that’s what I focus on.
Do you have a favorite country song of all time?
Maybe [Miranda Lambert’s 2009 ballad] “The House That Built Me.”
Have you ever thought about what you want your legacy to be as an artist?
Oh God. I mean, yes, I’ve thought about it. I honestly just want to make stuff that makes people feel something. And within that, similar to what we just talked about, I love talking about either feelings or topics or whatever in my music or in general that may feel taboo to some people. When there’s someone that I listen to and they say something that I feel like I haven’t said because I was scared, it almost feels like they give me and everyone else permission to feel that. If that’s what my music or legacy can do for anyone, that would make me feel accomplished in my life.
This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
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