11 Best Strap-On Dildos, Harnesses, & Beginner Kits for Everyone
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No matter how you were introduced to the world of best strap-on dildos and harnesses—whether through an eager partner as a couples' sex toy, or perhaps that one episode of Broad City—there’s plenty of fun to be had here. Strap-ons are a harness and dildo combined, primarily to allow the wearer (usually, but not always, someone with a vagina) to penetrate their partner vaginally, anally, or orally. This allows both people to experiment with positions and to get intimate in ways that their anatomy might not allow otherwise.
Most strap-ons secure the dildo with a harness that fits around the waist (or other body parts, like the thigh), although some are strapless and kept in place by the vaginal muscles. Beginners might opt for a set that includes both the harness and the dildo, while more advanced shoppers may want to select each component separately. With so many options available, it can be tricky to figure out where to start. To help you out, we tapped sex educators and experts, as well as our own testers, to review and bring you the best strap-ons and harnesses. Here’s everything you need to know about these versatile toys.
Your questions about strap-ons, answered
How we chose dildos
We spoke to sex educators and Glamour toy testers to narrow down a list of strap-on dildos and harnesses. We evaluated each option based on the following criteria in order to award them superlatives:
- Ease of use: How intuitive the harness was to wear and adjust; how simple it was to swap dildos in and out; how well the strapless strap-ons stayed put
- Design: How adjustable and inclusive the harness's size was; how thoughtful its features were, such as the ability to add bullet vibrators to the harness
- Performance: How comfortable the harness was to wear for long periods; if it vibrated, how strong and varied were its patterns and intensities?
- Value: Was this a set that included a dildo, harness, and any other additional accessories like O-rings (differently-sized rings that attach to the front of the harness and that hold the dildo in place)—and if so, was the amount of included products a worthy deal for the price? If it was a singular product, how high-quality was its make?
How to choose a strap-on harness
There are two ways to go about your search: looking for a strap-on set, or searching for a dildo and a harness separately. Choosing a kit is typically the less intimidating route if you’re a total newbie. That said, “The best way to play with strap-ons might be to choose the harness you love, and separately, the dildo you or your partner loves,” explains Carol Queen, PhD, an expert at sex-toy store Good Vibes. Buying them independently allows you to cater more to your own personal preferences. If you're going the separate route, here's what to know about picking a harness.
- Figure out what type of harness you want to use. There are several varieties of harnesses, most of which fasten around the waist in some fashion. There are jock-style harnesses (which leave your butt exposed); underwear harnesses (which look like regular briefs or panties); and corset-style harnesses (similar to jockstraps but with more lacing). A less common option is a two-hole harness, which can be used with two dildos or a single dildo and a penis for double penetrative sex. If you’d rather skip the harness thing entirely, strapless dildos are wearable and can be inserted into the vagina and held in place hands-free, kind of like the ultimate Kegel exercise.
- Materials should also factor into your decision. Webbing and fabric are the most basic materials, but you can also opt for leather. While the latter is sturdy, it’s also more porous and harder to clean; fabric is generally more comfortable and usually machine-washable. There are harnesses that come in plain or muted colors, fun laces and patterns, or that are even BDSM-inspired with studs and leather.
- Take sizing into account. Especially if you're looking for a waist harness, as not all are accommodating of plus sizing. If you’re not sure of the right size or you’ll be sharing your pick with a partner, adjustable harnesses can be resized as needed—and certain options can even accommodate packers, bullet vibrators, or panty vibrators. Most harnesses also feature stabilizers or O-rings (the mechanism that keeps strap-on sex toys in place); just make sure it’s the correct size for the one you're using. Dildos with flared bases (think suction-cup dildos) are often also harness-compatible.
How to choose a dildo
- Start small. If you're new to anal sex, it’s best to work your way up to the bigger stuff when selecting. Look for a dildo with an insertable length on the shorter, slimmer side (think five to six inches) before slowly increasing the size.
- Consider where you’ll be inserting the strap-on. Usually the wearer will insert the dildo into their partner’s anus or vagina. You don’t have to go huge to get the most pleasure from strapping. There’s an option for everyone along the spectrum of length and girth. (If you have a penis, you can also wear a hollow strap-on over your member to add length and girth.)
- Shape is another important factor. Plenty of dildos are meant to be extremely realistic, with lifelike molding and dual-density designs that mimic the feeling of real penises. That could turn you and your partner on, especially if you don’t have a penis of your own—but if you’d rather keep your bedroom penis-free, plenty of dildos are more abstract. Look for designs that curve up, which will allow you to hit your partner’s prostate or provide G-spot stimulation with ease.
- Silicone, silicone, silicone. Stick with silicone dildos, as anything too hard can be dangerous (and almost no glass dildo can work with a strap-on). “Avoid super-hard dildo materials when you are strapping on,” Dr. Queen says. “A wonky thrust can hurt someone if the dildo is glass, metal, stone, and so on.”
- Lube up. Whether you’re using a dildo to penetrate vaginally or for anal play, lubricant makes things a lot more fun and frictionless. Anal lube is especially important, as the anus doesn’t naturally lubricate itself—and make sure you’re using water-based lube, since silicone-based formulas can actually cause silicone sex toys to start breaking down.
How to talk to your partner about using a strap-on
Since a strap-on is a sex toy that’s designed to be used with a partner, it’s important to have a discussion before getting down to business. What does the partner on the receiving end want? What are they comfortable with? How important are length, girth, and overall dildo size? Make sure that you and your partner are 100% on the same page before making an investment in the best dildos.
How to use a strap-on dildo
You have a dildo, the harness, and your favorite water-based lube—so, what’s next? Well, strapping it on, of course! Naturally, if you’ve never wielded a dildo or anything phallic between your legs before, you might feel a bit strange, but don’t let that become your only feeling. Instead, embrace this new look, have a chuckle with your partner if you think it will lighten the mood, and lean into the fact that sometimes sexual exploration looks a little funny.
Once you and your partner get that step out of the way, it’s time to penetrate. With a well-lubed dildo, penetrate your partner slowly (assuming you're the one wearing the toy). This isn’t a race, so there’s no need to rush it. Maintain an open dialogue with them to ensure that you’re both on the same page and enjoying the experience. While eventually you’ll be able to take things up a notch and won’t have to coddle your strap-on scenario so much, it really is ideal—and we can’t stress this enough—to take it slow and gentle the very first time. With enough practice, you’ll be thrusting—and/or receiving dildo penetration—with the best of them.
How to you clean a strap-on
It’s important to clean your sex toys to prevent bacteria from living on them. Luckily, it’s easy to do so. The most straightforward way to clean your strap-on is with warm water and a gentle soap. Alternatively, you can grab specialty sex toy wipes or cleaners at basically any retailer that sells sex toys. If you’re really looking to go the extra mile, you can use a UV-light storage case, which uses UV-C light to disinfect toys (and anything else you might throw in the case).
Meet the experts
- Carol Queen, PhD, a staff expert at online sex-toy shop Good Vibes
- Amanda Chatel, a Glamour sex writer who has tested over a thousand toys
- Suzannah Weiss, MA, MPS, a certified sex educator, Glamour toy tester, and author of Subjectified: Becoming a Sexual Subject
Best Overall: Lovehoney Advanced Strap-On Harness Kit
Material: Body-safe silicone | Insertable length: 6 inches | Circumference: 4.75 inches | Maximum harness size: 65 inches | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Dildo, adjustable harness, three O-rings
- What we love: Approachable for beginners but with features experts will appreciate, including interchangeable O-rings and a pocket that can hold a small vibrator; harness is machine-washable
- What's worth considering: Dildo not compatible with silicone-based lubricants
Lovehoney's strap-on kit is the one of the most versatile we've encountered, and includes the necessary basics for anal play. With six inches of insertable length and a circumference just under five inches, it’s not as intimidating as it looks but can still please both newcomers and experts. (That gentle curve is sure to be a hit, too, as it can target the G-spot and P-spot.) “I love this set because it’s comfortable and easy to use and not overwhelming when you put it on,” says Amanda Chatel, a Glamour sex writer who has tested over a thousand toys. “As someone who prefers vibes with my dildos, I’ve found that putting a vibrating cock ring at the base against the O-ring really adds an extra thrill for both partners.” The machine-washable harness comes with a pocket for a vibrator and adjustable straps that shift from 28 to 65 inches. When you’re ready to bring another dildo into the mix, the kit provides with three interchangeable O-rings to accommodate toys of different diameters as you work your way up.
Best Strap-On Harness: Spareparts Hardwear Joque Harness
Material: Poly-spandex | Insertable length: N/A | Circumference: N/A | Maximum harness size: 50 inches | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Harness only, satin storage bag
- Why we love it: Compatible with dildos of any length; reviewer says it does a good job keeping toys in place; snug fit against the body; two pockets for bullet vibrators
- What's worth considering: Not as size-inclusive as other harnesses
If you’d prefer to pick and choose your harness and dildo separately, the Joque—aptly named for its jock-style design—is our experts' top pick, thanks to its ease of use. It has adjustable waist and leg straps for added comfort and support, with a built-in O-ring that’ll stretch between 1.25 and 2 inches to make room for a dildo with a flared base (no need to hunt around for multiple rings). Our reviewer praised how snugly the harness fit to their body, how strong its straps were yet soft enough to wear for long periods, and how easily they could swap in different dildos. There are also two pockets to slip in bullet vibrators for added stimulation during play.
Best for Beginners: Sportsheets New Comers Strap-On Dildo Set
Material: Body-safe silicone, polyester, plastic | Insertable length: 4 inches | Width: 0.75 inches | Maximum harness size: 60 inches | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Dildo, harness
- Why we love it: Affordable; beginner-friendly dildo size; harness is lightly padded for comfort; includes harness and dildo
- What's worth considering: Dildo may be too petite for more advanced buyers; harness only fits dildos up to 1.25 inches in width
This strap-on kit is an excellent option for beginners, says Dr. Queen; its included dildo is just four inches in insertable length and under an inch in width—the shortest and most slender of the ones we tested (and a nice entry-level size for those who are new to anal penetration and who may want to start with a more petite shaft). Its jock-style harness is made of a comfortable polyester, has adjustable straps that size up to 60 inches around the waist, and leaves your butt exposed for other types of stimulation. The overall set is under $30—a hard-to-beat price for the first-timer who isn't ready to drop serious money on strap-on play.
Best Strapless Strap-On: Strap-On-Me Multi-Orgasm Bendable Strap-On Dildo
Material: Body-safe silicone | Insertable length: 6.18 inches | Diameter: 1.65 inches | Battery: Rechargeable (run time of 70 minutes) | Maximum harness size: N/A | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Strap-on dildo with remote control
- Why we love it: Wide variety vibration modes to explore; remote control is easier to use during sex than a button on the toy itself; internal stimulation for both parties with vaginas; can be used with or without a harness; comes in four sizes
- What's worth considering: Some reviewers found it difficult to keep in place
A strapless strap-on dildo is held in place by its wearer’s vaginal muscles, providing hands-free penetration without a harness (which can feel distracting or scratchy to some). This vibrating strap-on truly does it all. You can slip it into a strap-on or wear it alone. The egg vibrator on one can be worn inside the vagina for G-spot stimulation, while its outer body buzzes against the clitoris and acting as a thrusting dildo. “You can easily control the power and speed with a wireless remote,” notes Suzannah Weiss, MA, MPS, a certified sex educator, Glamour toy tester, and author of Subjectified: Becoming a Sexual Subject. “There’s plenty of length to explore the G-spot, A-spot, prostate, and any other erogenous zones.” The dildo's textured body offers extra sensations, as does its nine vibrations. It's a great sex toy for couples without penises, as it gives internal sensation to both the wearer and receiver.
Best Value: Lovehoney Beginner’s Strap-On Harness Kit
Material: Body-safe silicone | Insertable length: 4.5 inches | Circumference: 3 inches | Maximum harness size: 68 inches | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Dildo, harness, three O-rings
- Why we love it: Beginner-friendly dildo size; O-rings make it easy to level up if desired; good value
- What's worth considering: Some reviewers found straps to be uncomfortable
This strap-on set is similar to our favorite Lovehoney Advanced. The crucial differences are that its ultra-adjustable harness is three inches wider, and its dildo is smaller and slimmer. It's five inches long and three inches thick. The harness has a built-in pocket behind the base where you can slide a bullet vibrator for extra stimulation and it comes with three O-rings that’ll help you graduate to something bigger if you ever want to. The set is under $50, making it ideal for beginners who may not be ready to invest in a more expensive set.
Best BDSM Kit: Lovehoney Take Control Bondage Kit
Material: Body-safe silicone | Insertable length: 6 inches | Circumference: 4.75 inches | Maximum harness size: 65 inches | Waterproof: Yes | What's included: Dildo, harness, three O-rings, blindfold, flogger, two silicone nipple suckers, ball gag, bullet vibrator, four cuffs, mattress strap system
- Why we love it: Tons of toys and accessories; harness can accommodate other dildos if needed; good value
- What's worth considering: Bullet vibrator is wired and battery-powered rather than rechargeable
Ready to explore even more of your sexual fantasies at once? This bondage kit from Lovehoney provides you with a huge variety of kinky sex accouterments, including a ball gag, blindfold, and nipple stimulators. “With this set, you have everything you could possibly want to explore different sensations and discover new sexual interests,” says Chatel. “I’ve recommended this to friends who are very new to BDSM play and they've loved it. I also know of super experienced kinksters who adore this set because it really does have it all—well, except the water-based lube.” The dildo's suction-cup base can separately be stuck to a hard surface for some shower sex (or penetrative masturbation). It’s the ultimate night in for the adventurous couple.
Best Underwear Harness: CalExotics Packer Gear Boxer Brief Harness
Material: Cotton, spandex, polyester, nylon | Insertable length: N/A | Circumference: N/A | Maximum harness size: L/XL (dress size 12 to 14)| Waterproof: No, but machine-washable if things get messy | What's included: Harness only
- Why we love it: Allows for versatility; has two vibrator pockets; fits double-ended dildos; discreet
- What's worth considering: Can’t switch out the O-ring
While they look like everyday underpants, this discreet pair of CalExotics briefs is actually sturdy enough to hold a dildo in place while in use. It features pockets that can hold vibrators or packers, plus a 1.5-inch silicone O-ring that can fit most dildos with a flared base. “These are great because the one doing the thrusting can also wear a butt plug and feel secure in knowing that the briefs will give the plug extra encouragement to stay in place,” says Chatel. “There’s something really hot about anally penetrating your partner, while you’re enjoying backdoor stimulation at the same time.” The front of the boxer also opens up completely, meaning there’s room to insert a double dildo if that’s more your speed. It’s available in a wide range of different sizes too.
Most Size-Inclusive Harness: Voluptuous Vixen Plus-Sized Harness
Material: Nylon, nitrile, brass, plastic | Insertable length: N/A | Circumference: N/A | Maximum harness size: 82 inches | Waterproof: No | What's included: Harness, three O-rings
- Why we love it: Size-inclusive; adjustable; comes O-rings
- What's worth considering: Doesn’t come with a dildo
This jock-style harness is designed specifically to accommodate hips up to 82 inches, making it far more size-inclusive than many of the harnesses on the market (most of which max out around 60 inches). It comes with three interchangeable O-rings, which allow you to swap in most dildo sizes. The harness also features padded back support so it’s comfortable to wear for longer stretches of time.
Best for Double Penetration: Lovehoney Double Vibrating Penetration Strap-On
Material: Body-safe silicone | Insertable length: 6 inches | Circumference: Not specified | Maximum harness size: N/A | Waterproof: Yes | Battery: Requires three LR44 batteries | What's included: Strap-on dildo, two bullet vibrators, batteries
- Why we love it: Provides double penetration; includes two bullet vibrators; hands-free
- What's worth considering: Penis and testicle rings can be a bit tight; a little noisy
Though it may look confusing, here's how this toy works: To use for vaginal penetration and G-spot stimulation, slip the silicone shaft inside the vagina, which will hold it in place hands-free (a bullet vibrator can fit inside the opening of the shaft to make the dildo vibrate; a second bullet vibe can be added to simultaneously buzz the harness's built-in rabbit ears against the clit). For double penetration, employ the toy's two rubber rings. One can slide around the shaft of a second dildo, while its other ring can secure around the balls. This way, both giver and receiver enjoy penetration at the same time, be it anal or vaginal. “When I crave double penetration, this is the first toy I reach for,” says Chatel. “It really has everything I need when I’m looking to literally be ravaged and (consensually) destroyed by my partner.” Although the included bullet vibrator requires batteries, that’s a minor inconvenience compared to the pleasure this toy serves up on a silver platter.
Best Thigh Harness: Sportsheets Ultra Thigh Strap-On Harness
Material: Neoprene | Insertable length: N/A | Circumference: N/A | Maximum harness size: 29 inches | Waterproof: No, but machine-washable | What's included: Harness only
- Why we love it: Machine-washable; allows for a wide variety of uses
- What's worth considering: Can’t switch out the O-rings to accommodate dildos of different sizes
This unique thigh harness fastens around the thigh. It’s ideal for people whose may find it uncomfortable or impossible to wear a harness around their hips, as well as those who just want to mix things up with a different type of harness. The harness has a secure hook-and-eye closure and reinforced 1.75-inch O-ring that keep the dildo in place. You can also wrap the harness around a pillow or other body part like your arm—the only limit is your imagination.
Best Lingerie-Style: Spareparts Sasha Couture Harness
Material: Nylon, spandex | Insertable length: N/A | Circumference: N/A | Maximum harness size: 62 inches | Waterproof: No, but it is machine-washable | What's included: Harness only
- Why we love it: Machine-washable; has a fun design; discreet
- What's worth considering: Not adjustable; can’t switch out O-rings
“There are excellent—and comfortable—fabric harnesses now,” says Dr. Queen. Case in point: The SpareParts Sasha Couture Harness, which has ribbon ties and decorative trim that reminds us of playful lingerie. It can accommodate dildos ranging from 1.25 inches to 2.25 inches in diameter and has two built-in bullet vibrator pockets. This harness isn’t adjustable, but it's available in sizes ranging from XS to 3XL and comes in two different colors. Dr. Queen notes that this pair is “quite femme-of-center in the styling, though, and this company makes more masc-looking items also, all with excellent wearability.” (We're partial to the CalExotics Packer Gear Boxer Brief Harness, also on this list.)
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